Tag Archives: Valentine

When a Man Loves a Woman

Volume 2, Issue 43

“He’d give up all his comforts, sleep out in the rain 
If that’s the way she said it ought to be”
from Percy Sledge’s Grammy Hall of Fame song

He had magically met and married the woman of his dreams. She was the same as he was in so many ways. Both devoted their lives to the same thing. They then eventually discovered each other in a way that was a series of improbabilities, suggesting to the average observer that the hidden hand of the Universe had to be involved.

And now, improbably, they were both trying to change each other. He contemplated this from a moment’s lofty perch. He had to LOL (laugh out loud).

He decided he would not resist her attempts to change him — which were all obviously for his own good — and that he would go along with the changes just to make her happy. And further, he would be ultra-cautious to change anything about her, because he might lose more than gained by any change to what she was already to him.

“But don’t change a hair for me
Not if you care for me”
—“My Funny Valentine”, Richard Rodgers and Lorenz Hart

 When he really felt from time to time afterward that he did want to change something anyway, he’d start by merely imagining it. Sometimes she would seem to pick up on these imaginings. She would notch a step in the desired direction and neither would comment. Sometimes when that didn’t happen too soon he would himself notch it up a bit and pray for the desired slight change. That usually worked. If nothing worked, he’d sigh and go on, accepting that it was a part of her that perhaps he wasn’t appreciating enough, and one day he would be grateful she had resisted his gentle nudges.

 These mental/emotional strategies tended to work out pretty well for them. They lived a candlelit romantic life day after day with no end in sight. Sharing these thoughts with other couples everywhere for whatever value they might have, if these thoughts travel well. We hope they do.

Best to all,


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